Written by , Directed by

Guest starring Bethany Ashton, Elizabeth Keener, Jonathan Penner as Brad

Also starring Rebecca Stauber as Carol, Kristy K. Eisenberg as Jane, Francisco Paz as Julio

Co-starring Amy Zellner as Patty, Melanie Daigle as Rebecca, Nick Puga as clerk, Michael Diamond as Tom, and Cisco as Deputy

Susan: "The word is Kismet."
David: "The word is Yenta."

David: "What do you do when you're just handsome, charming and full of crap?"
Thumper: "Well, thank God for television."

David: "Well, I think we're looking at the future ex-Mrs. Brad Schwartz."

David: "What does that get me?"
Susan: "My eternal affection."
David: "I thought I already had that."
Susan: "No, what you had was friendship with a grudging respect."

David: "The moment wasn't exactly right."
Thumper: "What did you want? For her to start ovulating?"

Elena: "When we're in New York next weekend, he's going to take me to all his favorite restaurants. I'll probably come home as one big thigh."

David: "Okay, it's true, I am in love."
Susan: "That we know."
David: "I'm in love with you. That we didn't know."
Susan: "No. Really?"
David: "Yeah, forever. And I just couldn't say anything 'cause it didn't seem like the right.... Aw, I don't know, I love you, and if that ruins everything, then that ruins everything, but that's how it is. I love you, so there."

Susan: "Me? I'm in love. We'll probably find a way to screw it up, but for now I'm still whispering sweet nothings in David's ear."
David: "That's all I heard."